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Pain during intercourse

When it hurts – pain during intercourse 


Pain during intercourse or other sexual activities occurs in both sexes. To feel discomfort naturally affects both the pleasure and the desire for sex. The pain can also lead to a conscious or unconscious fear of sex. Sex is an important part of life and love relationships, so do not hesitate to seek professional help.

Pain during intercourse for women

In women, there are a number of conditions that can cause pain. The most common is the lubrication – the moisture of the vagina.


If it hurts during penetration, when penis is inserted into the vagina, the pain often depends on the fact that you are not aroused during the introduction. When aroused, moisture increases in the vagina and acts as lubricant. To wash with oil in the genital area instead of soap and water, helps keep the delicate mucous membrane smooth. After childbirth, lubrication can be affected and it may seem strange to have intercourse at all. It is wise to wait about 6-8 weeks after childbirth with penetrating sex.

Lubricants give a more moist feeling

Lubrication decreases with increasing age. In menopause when the estrogen level is lowered, the mucous membranes become more delicate. A weak estrogen cream can be used, following the advice of gynecologist. If the mucous membrane is sensitive and you want a more moist feeling, you can use Belladot Original water-based lubricant. Never use oil or skin cream as a lubricant with a condom, as it makes the condom fragile and it is likely to break.

Infections and infestations

The pain may also be due to urinary tract infections or infections in the mucous membrane of the vagina. Sexually transmitted diseases such as genital herpes, human papillomavirus (eg condyloma) and chlamydia may cause pain and irritation in the genital area. Vaginos, for small lactic acid bacteria, and candida, fungi, are common causes of itching and pain. If you are in pain it is important to seek medical help in order to find out the reason and get treatment.


Some women choose to have intercourse, even though they are not aroused enough and despite it hurting. The reason may be to hope that the pain will disappear by itself over time. You may not want to make your partner disappointed or afraid not to be a good enough woman, with the risk of being left. Having sex even though it hurts is to expose the risk that the pain, even if the original cause disappears, turns into a nervous system hypersensitivity. Hypersensitivity makes all the touches that you usually feel resistant to hurt, sometimes even the pressure of the fabric in the underwear. Vestibulitis is such a pain condition. The vagina may look quite normal when examined, but hurts when touched. Getting rid of a vestibulitis can be a long process. There are a number of ideas on how to ease the trouble. Biofeed-back, a method used, involves slowly getting the nerves used to touch. Analgestic ointment, calmness and relaxation while touching the area that hurts can eventually break the old pain pattern.



Worries about it hurting can also cause the vagina to pinch on contact and make it impossible to have intercourse, sometimes even to insert a tampon. This so-called cramp or vaginism is reflexive and can not be influenced by the will. Women who easily have muscle tension in other parts of the body may be at greater risk of vaginism. Vaginism can also be caused by forgotten fear of a painful gynecological examination, childbirth, abuse and / or painful penetration. It may also arise in fear that the first intercourse will hurt. It is good to know that the vagina stretch when necessary, only the vaginal opening is affected by vaginism. In case of severe vaginism, treatment is required by gynecologists or likewise. If you want to train yourself, you can try to gently insert the top of your littlefinger repeatedly until you no longer get a cramp. Then you gradually try to insert your finger longer and longer, then try a thicker finger and maybe two fingers. When it’s time for the next step, Belladot Greta is recommended, a minivibrator that is only 18 mm in diameter.

Find other ways to have sex

Meanwhile, until the vestibulite and vaginism have healed, it is of course necessary to refrain from penetrating sex. There are many different ways to have sex. Many women enjoy clitoral orgasm despite the other symptoms. The most important thing in these situations is to be able to talk with their partner, have an understanding of each other’s feelings and find options that both can be satisfied with. The partner can also participate in the training if it feels comfortable. Training of pelvic floor muscles so that the body learns a difference in tense and relaxed muscles can be helpful in these pain conditions.

Deeper pain condition

A deeper pelvic pain that complicates intercourse can be caused by inflammation of uterus or ovaries. Even endometriosis, which means that you have a uterine mucous membrane in the wrong place in the abdomen often gives this kind of pain. A back-worn uterus is also said to be able to cause deep joint pain.

Pain during intercourse for men

For you as a man there are some conditions that can cause pain during intercourse. If you have pain in the abdomen and penis it is important to consult a doctor or urologist for examination.

Pain during penetration

Pain in penetration can be caused by an infection or virus in the penis, such as herpes or gonorrhea. Sometimes it may hurt at penetration if it´s not moist enough. Belladot Original water-based lubricant acts as a lubricant and reduces friction. When using a condom it is important to choose a silicone or water-based lubricant. If you use oil or skin cream instead, the condom becomes fragile and may burst.

Tight foreskin and damage to the penis

If you have tight foreskin or if it has been exposed to excessive friction, penetration may be painful. Likewise in case of skew, injury or fracture on the penis.

Prostate conditions

Prostate conditions such as prostatitis can, in addition to weight and discomfort in the abdomen, also cause pain in intercourse.

Allergy and hypersensitivity

Some men have problems caused by allergy to vaginal secretions or chemicals in condoms or lube.


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